Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Peaceful Knowing

The cold rages on outside. No more snow but frigid temperatures continue. -14 to be exact. Schools are closed, everyone is hunkering down until the temperatures rise once again.
Last year I would have been out of my mind. I was so cold and so anxious about the winter. Not so this year.
I am right where I belong. Cold, frigid temperatures and all. I have my baby girl doing math next to me and listening to my husband work so hard and so long one room over. All of us together in one place.
There are times I question home-schooling. I wonder how Lina will do compared to her siblings. My other three had each other, they played together when the studies were done. She is alone with two adults more than with her brother and sisters. Today I was reminded of bringing Gabe and Becca home from public school mid-year to be home-schooled. I remember the conviction God gave me to bring up our family differently. Gabe all of 6 years old and Bec all of 5, sitting together for a couple hours learning how to read and write. Learning about God's world around them. Learning how to be kind and compassionate. Then there was little Boo, joining in with her toys and waiting for them to be done so they could all play together. My kids lived life together... not just book knowledge. They learned God's word and memorized it. they cooked, cleaned, played together while I read aloud to them. They became friends.
I'm glad in the stillness of this cold day God reminded me of this.
In this new season of life for me I have two adult children paving their way in this world. Both in college on opposite sides of America. I have another teenage daughter in her junior year of high school going to college full time. And then I have my baby girl, Lina. Still growing, still changing, about to enter some of the toughest years ahead of her; the time I loved the most with my other three: Junior High. In all this, I struggle with the need to help out with college bills. Juggle. Juggle. Juggle.
But today, today I am reminded Who my provider is. I am reminded I am doing my part by God's grace and provision. And I am reminded of the conviction God placed in our life 14 years ago to walk a different path with our children's education.
Life never stays the same, I know this far too well. But God doesn't change and His vision for me hasn't either. Some times I just need a quiet -14 day to be reminded.

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